This week, I have received two comments about my zebras.
The first one came from a soccer mum who said that it was great to have my son in the team because he is so passionate that he is “the soul of the team”.
The second one came from the director of my daughter’s musical theatre. She asked us if my daughter could join the older kids’ performances. She was glad to join, and the director sent me a message after the first two performances telling me that my 10 years old was “so professional”.
They nailed it. Both of them. Of course, you cannot limit your kids to one adjective or one trait of their personality, but it was so accurate. And it was very interesting to have those comments the same week.
So, what do you do with that? You often hear people say that they make no difference between their kids and that they raise them in the same way. I doubt it is true and it certainly isn’t a great thing to do. Every zebra has different stripes, and we need to adapt our parenting to each one of them. They will find that this is not “fair”, and they will be right. But this will be equitable. You will focus in nurturing each one of your zebras with what she/he really needs. The answer to a tantrum can be completely different from one kid to another. You will praise one for a certain behavior when you will consider the same behavior as natural for the other. The only trap to avoid is not seeing one’s efforts because he/she is more “easy going” than the other.
Parenting is not “one size fits all”. It must be haute couture.